s i m p l e t h o u g h t s

dream within the nightmare

people have concluded that the universe is a nightmare, i woke up and i found myself realizing the dream within it...

When you sleep

Life is like having dreams and nightmares when you sleep
Death is like having no dreams and no nightmares when you sleep

Actions and Effects

To be right is only human
To be wrong is only human
To do evil under the disguise of achieving good
is the work of the heartless
To do good but achieve evil is the work of prophets,
gods and the shortsighted

remember how to forget

we write things down in order to free our mind of those thoughts...

so when you are sad, write down your sadness so your mind may find a way to move on... and when you are happy, there is no need to forget, that's why happy thoughts are seldom written or sung out loud...

The Twist

At the very moment of one's own death, a person will realize that heaven and hell actually resided in each passing breath. After this epiphany, all the person can do is sleep with the silence of indifference.


root

love is the root of every thing

thing is desire, is faith, is attachment, is forgiveness, is jealousy, is hate, is anger, selfishness, selflessness

indifference is the lack of love


forgiveness

i'm the most beautiful person i've ever met...
i'm the ugliest person i have ever forgiven...

the prometheus question

the question is not whether you can die for the things you love, the real question is whether you are willing to live in hell for all the things that love and hate you...


effort to be only human

in our efforts to become like gods, some of us never realize how to be only human...


all i'm trying to be, is to be truthful to who i am...

how can i stop to dream if that's the way i know how to breathe? how can i stop to dream if that is stronger than my faith? how can i stop to dream if that is part of how i love?

scale

in the micro-scale, freewill exists;
in the macro-scale, predetermination prevails...


Winning in Losing

I surrender to Love
I'm not afraid anymore
Past mistakes, I have learned from
Uncertainties, I'll have no more

Oh how wonderful it is
To finally forgive my past self
Oh how wonderful it will be
To finally face each moment of reality

I say goodbye to sorrowful tears
It was the bleeding of a heart in pain
I say hello to fearless tears
It is a heart laughing at all its fears

I surrender... I surrender...
For Love has finally won me over....

5/15/2003
u village starbucks, seattle

be original, be yourself! i have heard more than
a couple hundred times that there are no more original
ideas to be dreamed under this sky of ours... but
do you honestly believe that you have lived before? and
in the same circumstance? if you believe to be unique,
then everyday, an original idea is born... take heed
of this and be glad, for a newborn child is the
hope by which we can grasp and understand...

in an effort to be human, we forget to realize that
we are surrounded by other humans as well... let it
be said, that the greatest crime in life is the lack of
awareness of one's heart, for we are lead to believe
that it is weak, that it is prone to error when
a human being puts one's heart above one's better
judgement... but i want to rebel against this inhumane
idea! let it be known, that i will follow my heart to the
glories of heaven and the misery of hell... if only
to taste what is left of my tears of both sorrow
and joy that has visited my human face

what is life but the reason by which we have taken
the first leap of faith, the first choice and some
may call it, the original sin... but why is it a sin
to take a breath? why is it called a sin to yearn
to exist? if not for a brief moment in one's time
on earth but also through the memories of one's glory
days and past mistakes! but who will remember the
days when one only takes a shallow wade through the
ocean of life? who will remember the nights when
one has forgotten to appreciate the ground by which
dreams or even nightmares play? aye, let me have
a reason to fear death so that i may appreciate
eternity... let me have a reason to celebrate my
past, so i may bring my lessons with me to the
realm of all things known... let me have hope so i
may wake up from boredom and see the truth right
in front of me... my fellow human being, learn to swim!

my shadow will follow where i will walk... i alone
know my own path for the reasons i have reached
where i am is the result of who i am... i cannot lay
blame on anyone... i try not to use my toungue to
speak ill will of my fellow students of life... how can
i judge when i am also guilty of not knowing everything?
hold on for a moment and learn how to take a breath...
now that you have, that is all yours to take freely,
now, how then can you take away someone else's right
of the very same breath?

the goal in life is to become one's own hero... why
does one search for things that can never be reached?
how come the nearest heart and mind be the same ones so
far away? don't be tempted of admiration of others
unless they inspire you to appreciate what you
have... i have met a few, i have conversed with fewer,
and each one is as unique and special as a moment
ticking away... why waste time being lost when you
know where you stand at all times? be glad that you
have a shadow! be glad that there exists a mirror!
are you now ready to take a step?

how can one ask for eternity, if one doesn't appreciate
the very short time that they have in this human body?
for i believe that we are here to learn to appreciate
what we have long ago lost to boredom, indifference or
some other personal version of hell... yes, it is hell
when one does not know how to appreciate each moment
passing by... if we must compare, compare the lessons
that you have learned in the past and the lessons that
you are learning right now... don't be afraid...
we are only human...

have you learned your lesson, good... then learn some
more... if not, continue asking questions, the first
lesson is to learn how to ask politely, the second
lesson is to learn what to ask... you will know the
third lesson when the time comes... alas, learn not
to waste time, that is a lesson that you should have
learned already...

5/16/2003
my home, seattle

now i will speak of love... when i fall in love, it will
hurt, for i know that this woman will make me blind...
for each moment of each day, i see beauty that surrounds
tempting me, but when i fall in love, beauty will lose
all meaning, my dreams will lose all their luster,
heaven and the gods will lose their mastery over me...
so i will ask for forgiveness beforehand, and
you will know when it will happen for you will not
hear of my footsteps anymore... i will be floating on
clouds so high that i will have no need of walking...

5/17/2003
my home, seattle

you ask me to find balance, yet you tell me to try my best?

5/18/2003
my home, seattle

if you want to understand God, Allah, Buddha, etc.. converse with
a parent, grandparent, or a couple that have just fallen in Love...
if you want to understand Jesus, Muhammed, Abraham, etc... converse with
your favorite teacher or your best friend
if you want to understand indifference, converse with
the sun, the moon, the stars, a diamond, an earthquake or a volcano
if you want to understand yourself, converse with
a child and listen to the conversation between your heart and mind
now you know why it is very important to learn how to converse...

5/18/2003
alki beach, seattle

and stop being confused, heaven and hell are just adjectives

5/18/2003
while driving, seattle

now, i sometimes wonder if Jesus, Muhammed or Buddha ever farted...

5/19/2003
my home, seattle

it might be of interest for all text or songs that mentions
God, Allah, Buddha, Yahweh, Jehovah, Gia etc...
to just bluntly use the word LOVE instead...
why? why not?

i have heard people say that my words are too deep,
but i don't understand... the words that i have written
barely scratches the ocean of thoughts that i'm drowned in,
in every moment of each day and i only write them like a whale
taking a breather to say hi to the friendly sky...

5/20/2003
my home, seattle

it is of my humble opinion that a major cause of suffering
is indifference... nature is very indifferent... but i don't
understand why a human heart could ever have the capacity
for indifference... to feel is the very reason that separates
us from the coldness and boredom of an indifferent universe...

i often been asked which came first, the chicken or the egg
i don't know, i don't know how to converse with a chicken or an egg...
ask yourself though, which came first, the mother or the child?
before the child existed, the mother is but a woman,
before the mother could exist, she needed her child
also, ask yourself, which came first, the teacher or the student?

i should learn sign language...

5/21/2003
my home, seattle

conversing with a rock is boring...
i guess indifference is boring as well..

some friends have said that my thoughts are dangerous,
but aren't we all going to die?
so i say, live life or die trying...

5/23/2003

"love thy neighbor as you love yourself", what a
wonderful rule... what an amazing idea... but i ask...
who is my neighbor and who am i? before i can love
both, don't i need to know them first?

i've been thinking a lot about the afterlife
that one day i just got tired of it,
then i started thinking about life
and enjoyed that train of thought for a while
yet my mind wanted to rest for a moment, so not
wanting to dwell with the profound thoughts of
the afterlife again, my mind wandered into a
thought i never fully explored before and
it's the thought of the existence of the beforelife
my mind has been always too preoccupied with what's after
that it never had the chance to taste the ideas of
what was before and as my dreams about the beforelife
became clearer, somethings started to make sense...

what if we had all the rewards promised in the afterlife
before we have chosen to be born in this body?
it may be possible that we all got bored with it and
here in our life, we will learn how to appreciate
what we already had? this idea made me remember
an older thought that visited my mind a while back...

"the grass is only greener on the other side of the fence
unless one waters the grass around them..."

but what of suffering in this world? a question was
asked... suffering is a direct result of only two
things, indifference from nature and indifference
from the human heart... we have little control of
nature but we are all humans born with feelings,
so we might as well figure how to conquer indifference
in our hearts in the limited time that we have...
we wont know until we try...

i wonder if "respect every one, as you respect yourself"
would be a lot easier to understand

5/29/2003

It occured to me today that I spent too much time
thinking about death and sadness... that I never
thought of the fact that I could have never existed!
What a life that would have been...

to not know...
to not reason...
to not feel hurt...
to not feel love..
to not have friends...
to not learn...
to not dance...
to not question...

So if one just contemplated this for one second of
each day, the act of breathing just suddenly feels
like being in heaven...